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She's the project manager at the Victorian Women's Trust and co-founder of Rosie. While it may still be considered taboo to sext — send and receive usually DIY sexually explicit content via digital platforms or mobile phones — there's no denying that many people do it.
That same triple j survey found that 22 per cent of young men and 56 per cent of young women have, at some point, received unwanted sexts. It also found that two in three young people reported seeing a sext that wasn't meant for them. Here are some tips to keep you, and others, safe while sharing some of your most intimate assets. Get our newsletter for the best of ABC Everyday each week. Most of us strive to see the best in people, especially those we like. But sometimes people disappoint us. And when it comes to sex and relationships, the stakes can be pretty high.
Sharing potentially compromising content with someone you love or someone you have a fleeting connection with is no different. Ms Otten says, first and foremost, sexting should be "anything that you feel comfortable with, whether that be you a little bit more bare … you with clothes on and maybe a few buttons undone, maybe it's just you with your clothes on looking hot, or you can be naked — that's fine. Whatever suits you and your sexting partner at the time". Once you've decided how much or little you want to show off, consider which safety measures you want to put in place.
A sure-fire way to reduce the risk of your sexts impacting you in a way you didn't intend is to make sure you can't be identified in the image. Jackie, from Lavington in NSW, offers some sage advice: "Never send a naked pic with your face in it. I also try and avoid identifying things in the background, like photos or mail, or information or bits and pieces that can maybe reveal who you are. Ms Oliver-Perham agrees that plausible sext deniability is something you might want in the future. Sexting may be becoming more common, but that doesn't give your partner the right to expect that you'll do it.
In fact, Ms Oliver-Perham says if someone is pressuring you to send them explicit content, then it's very likely a red flag. And conversely, you shouldn't be pressuring anyone else to take part in this behaviour unless they really want to.
Ms Otten adds that it's not only strangers that can misuse your private content, but also partners. The Office of the eSafety Commissioner says image-based abuse occurs when "intimate, nude or sexual images are distributed without the consent of those pictured".
Even if you have a trustworthy sexting partner, there's always context to consider. Direct messages, whether they're via phone or social media platform, are not always as direct and private as we'd like to think. Ms Otten says it's worth considering the time of day that you're sending your steamy dispatches.
In the end, Ms Oliver-Perham says the most important thing to consider when sexting is the content's longevity. But five years down the track, we don't really know what's going to happen and how that relationship can go," she says.
This story was originally broadcast on triple j's The Hook Up. ABC Everyday helps you navigate life's challenges and choices so you can stay on top of the things that matter to you. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the lands where we live, learn and work.
ABC Everyday. Print content Print with images and other media. Print text only. Print Cancel. Sex therapist Chantelle Otten thinks this is no bad thing. address. Why affairs don't always mean the end for relationships. What to do when things get routine in the bedroom. Being brave in the bedroom: How to ask for what you want. Is it really possible to be 'friends with benefits' without catching feelings? Ghosting, kittenfishing and orbiting: A glossary of modern dating terminology. My partner lost his erection and now he's avoiding sex.
What should I do? Faking orgasms could be contributing to the orgasm gap. Back to top.Hot Girl Hookup Perham
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How to practise safe sexting