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Future Educator. Read full profile. If only we could be young again! Young and in love but with the knowledge we have now. Oh, to have that perspective! My first real relationship was quite a doozy, with a lot of mistakes made, so I am going to address this article to my younger self before I started dating boys. If you have not yet entered your first relationship, please read this to better prepare yourself for what is to come. Only you can define yourself. You are not defined by your boyfriend or girlfriend. A person needs to be confident of him or herself before entering any kind of serious relationship.
You need to be happy with the person you are and the choices you make when you are alone. Do not depend on another person to make you feel good. A great way to ruin amazing friendships is to ditch your friends for a boy or girl. Believe you me! Your family and friends were there first. This is hard to understand when you are young and your hormones are making you dizzy and sick with love.
No one and nothing else could ever get in the way of your love! No matter how wonderful a relationship might seem, if you are too young to know what you want, it might not last. Since your first relationship might not last, it is best to guard yourself, at least a little. At the same time, you need to be able to open up in order to have a romantic relationship. Try your best to find this balance.
This is part of life and almost to be expected. When you open yourself up to another person, vulnerability occurs. This creates a close connection between two people, but it can also leave you open for a world of hurt. It is up to you how much of your heart you will risk for the relationship. Determine boundaries beforehand. Decide for yourself what is acceptable in the way you are treated, both verbally and physically.
Then tell your partner and stick to those boundaries. It is an awful thing to find out along the way that you have given up too much. Life is still happening around you. Do not forgo everything else in your life just to spend time with your boyfriend or girlfriend.
Being in a relationship does not mean you lose all sense of self. Have your own interests and friends. At the same time, realize your boyfriend or girlfriend needs to have his or her own hobbies and social groups as well.
You should be able to spend time together, just not all of your waking moments. This is one of the hardest lessons to learn mainly for women—we seem to want to change our men. Oh, Hollywood, how you trick the youth of the world with your gold-spun stories of love and romance! We are fooled into believing that finding romantic love is the greatest thing in life.
Problems are supposed to melt away, there is no fighting and you drive off into the sunset, a complete person with your mate. Romance can be great, but keeping a relationship thriving is work. Be prepared to work if you truly want it to last. Sure, you might stay together and grow old with your first love, but if not, use your first relationship as a learning tool. What went wrong? What went right?
How could you have communicated better? These are all things we learn from early relationships that help us in cultivating a better one down the road. Love can truly be amazing. The thing is, you might not know how to deal with or even know about the negative possibilities when entering a first relationship. Learn from these things and be better prepared when you take that first step. Eugene is Lifehack's Entrepreneurship Expert. He is the co-founder and creative lead of HighSpark, offering presentation training for companies. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step.
A familiar thump echoes throughout your body — your heartbeat has gone off the charts. Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage. If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside. Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:.
The audience will notice you are nervous. If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements.
Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time: Advertising. Ever felt parched seconds before speaking? And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out.
A sip of water will do the trick. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly. Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength.
Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage. One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure. Do I look funny? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose — contributing something of value to your audience. Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people.
This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart. There are two sides constantly battling inside of us — one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities.
Which one will you feed? What if I forget what to say? All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy — a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is. Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most.
Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about. One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech. However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts. Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content — a definite way to stress themselves out.
Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner.First relationship tips
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11 Tips For Communicating More Effectively In Your First Real Relationship